literature

Balloon

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NiallCloud's avatar
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Literature Text

In the afternoon
Strolling in the park he buys a wonderful, red-coloured balloon
For her, and for her alone
For her early beauty he wants to hone

And as they stroll together
In the park, with a fair weather
Her balloon is gazed upon
By others that have not yet won

His gentle kiss on her cheek
And as he takes a quick peek
Her red lipstick stains on his coat
And his life to her he did devote

And her eyes met his
And they both forgot all what is
Deeply entwined
And forever affined

She let go, of her beautiful, old balloon
In the park, as she is watching the moon
She cries, though without sound
Her tears reach the ground

And in the weak moonlight
Their love letters she reads, just to cite
That forever they were bound
And still their words astound

That night, the rain set in
And drowned her from within
Her wish was only to rest
After herself she had undressed

And naked she steps in and out
Beyond any doubt
Like her balloon, they both are up in the sky
And their story had gone awry
This is my second attempt at rhyme. If the meaning of the poem is unclear, feel free to comment, and I will answer any questions you might have.

Inspired by the wonderful and talented Emilie Autumn and the Victorian Era. Now the poem may not directly be related to this, but it certainly has affected the way the poem was written.
Comments13
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TinPenguin's avatar
It seems as though you are less comfortable with rhyme than non-rhyming. It will help if you read out every stanza to yourself, and make sure it sounds right out loud. Try to keep a constant rhythm throughout, as this will make the rhyme seem more natural. Above all, though, practise is the best tutor! ;)

Anyway, nice poem, nice metaphor. I like the symbolism of the transition from day to night.